February 2005 Archives

[Insert Clever Title Here]


Service With a Paradoxical Smile


In honor of my new subscription to Amazon Prime, I decided to go on a little buying spree. I ended up pre-ordering The Cosmic Game, Thievery Corporation's new CD. Release date: 2/22. Apparently through the magic of time travel, my CD completed its 2-day shipping and arrived here today, the day before it was released. Hooray!

How May I Ignore You Today?


Around 7:15AM today I was heading to work in the left lane of I-35. I was not there because I am too stupid to understand "Slower Traffic Move Right" signs. I was there to pass. Specifically, I wanted to get around the semi to my right.

The semi had other plans.

The driver decided that he couldn't wait long enough for me to pass, he had to make pass NOW. He proceeds to cut me off. Not almost hitting me cutting me off, but I ended up getting way closer to his back end than I needed to be.

This irritated me.

What irritated me eve more, however, was the fact that his relatively rapid lane change caused him to move too far left. Outside the painted lines, in fact.

Result: My car was sandblasted by the salt/dirt that waits just outside the boundaries of intelligent driving.

Just for fun, I decided that today would be the day that I actually used the equivalent of a "How's my driving?" number. I took note of his truck number and the company, and I called them when I got to work.

The man that answered the phone actually seemed irritated that I would bother him with a complaint about a driver. He took my name, number, and got a description of what happened.

  • Discourteous Un-helper Monkey: "So maybe he didn't see you?"
  • Me: "That's a distinct possibility"
  • DUM: "Well, there's not much we can do about that"

Really?? I'm pretty sure that trucks have mirrors, and they're there for the express purpose of enabling the driver to see the area around him. If you can't see a bright blue car with huge headlights that happen to be on, I think maybe there is something you can do.

Quit driving.


Picture of the gecko
Picture of owl flying

My roomate's gecko Chase, soon to be eaten by one of the Canadian invaders on the right.

UPDATE: Pete fixed the owl image for me. You can almost tell what it is now.



Apparently MrAirbear has gone AWOL. Weird.

Picture Day

Pic of Total boxes stacked up wall

Behold, puny mortals, and despair! Believe it or not, I actually moved all 26 of my Total cereal boxes from my old apartment to my new townhouse. The Wall of Total lives again.

Pic of sunrise under Hwy 33 Bridge

A quick picture of the highway bridge just down the street from my office, taken as I got to work this morning.

Long Time Driver, First Time Parker


As a follow up to my previous efforts to get myself killed, I think I need a few of these.

Super Bore


Did anyone else notice a striking similarity between the older couple in future shock: late at night (7/8 of the way through) and the one in the commercial for the Olympus Groove thingy (TV Spots, Pure Gold Groove, 1/3 of the way in)? I didn't think so. Watch that video, it's much cooler than the commercial. The commercial looks like a rip-off to me.

Couple from the Olympus Groove spot
Olympus Groove
Couple from the future shock music video
future shock

An Open Letter


Dear alarm clock,

While your service these past years has been, on the whole, satisfactory, I must take issue with your recent behavior.

Specifically, you have failed at the most basic task required of any time-keeping device: keeping time. Allow me to elaborate.

When I set my alarm for 6:00 AM, I expect to be awakened at 6AM. To spend 40 minutes on daily preparations only to find that all other clocks in the house read 6:20 AM is, in a word, unacceptable.

When I stow you in a bin, unplugged, I expect you to maintain your time. I provided you with a battery for a reason. When I plug you back in, I do not expect to see that you have, in fact, gained a full hour. The only thing more irritating than waking up at 5:40 AM is waking up at 5:00 AM.

I have 2 words for you, alarm clock:

Office Space.